Is that the question? In our house, it's more about when and how much.
I know everyone has a different opinion on spanking and they are usually strong opinions at that. I've always felt that spanking is just a part of raising children. However, only if it truly motivates your child. If it isn't a punishment that works, well, than why use it?
Lydie is a bit young for a spanking, but poor little Sophie has had her fair share. I prefer to only spank her through her clothes. I don't want to really hurt her, I just want her to understand the severity of the choice she made or the lie she told.
For example: Sophie would get a spanking if she tells me she hates me and wants me to die. I think a spanking is the appropriate punishment here.
But...I really don't want to be spanking her for every little thing or for a bad attitude. So...any suggestions? Time outs don't really work. I have been sending her to her room when she cries or throws a fit for no reason. Taking toys or TV away really doesn't work for her, since we don't watch that much TV.
Curious to know what y'all think, whether you spank or not! :)
Love,
Michelle
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Hey Michelle - It's Megan. I know that I won't have to deal with this issue for a while, but I wanted to say that I do agree with you that in some instances spankings are in order. However, I think they should be limited to situations that are so severe that the message needs to be clearly communicated.
ReplyDeleteIf time outs and taking away things don't work what about a "make your day approach"? Meaning some kind of reward system. For example, when we were kids we got pizza as a treat on Friday nights. You could have a chart for each day of the week that tracks how she did and if she doesn't make her days she doesn't get Friday night pizza? I've seen this work two ways. The first is getting stars for doing things like eating all of her vegetables, going to bed on time, etc. Or you can start her off as "green" and turn her to yellow if she is misbehaving. Red means she didn't make her day at all.
Anyway - just a thought.
I agree with you. Spanking should be reserved for those offenses that are pretty severe. In our house lying and blatant disobedience is a spank. My 3 year old doesn't get spanks as much as time outs (they just don't work!). He really hates to be in the corner. I make him put his face towards the corner and we don't talk to him until his time is up. Spanks work for the others. We do use "loss of privilage" and "extra work" for some offenses. Every household is different! I use the Doorposts charts to keep me on track (so I don't forget what punishment goes with the crime!).
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